The yearning..

Bekhayali me bhi tera hi khayal aaye, kyun bichhadna hai jaruri ye sawaal aaye...

Teri najdikiyon ki khushi behisaab thi, hisse me faasale bhi tere bemisaal aaye.

Tarun was trying to catch the beats of the woofer remembering the time spent with Sonu.

He looked at Sonu’s photo on his cell phone while dousing the cigarette in his left hand,

“She’s married now. It was a mutual decision”, he told himself, “But then why are her thoughts still troubling me…. why??” He screamed in the empty room full of smoke.

Tarun was not able to accept that Sonu has gone far from him, after being (happily) married. All he was recollecting was the day when she met him for the last time, before her wedding,

“I don’t want to get married, Tarun. I am not feeling happy with this marriage. I just can’t think of being happy with anyone but you.“ Sonu told with her eyes wet.

“See Sonu, we have already agreed on that. I told you in the beginning itself that I cannot marry you, I am yet to decide about my career.”

“How can you be so selfish, Tarun? Sometimes I feel that you never loved me. It was just a give and take relationship.” Sonu got upset.

“Shhh. Please don’t scream now. My room is not sound proof; someone may think there is something fishy. As such people have become more vigilant in Mumbai.”

“I don’t wanna talk to you, I am leaving.” Sonu picked her handbag.

‘Heyy dear, please don’t get angry.” Tarun held Sonu’s hand and laid her handbag on the floor, “Just. Look at me” he said.

“What? What is there to look at you? You are not Shah Rukh Khan who would cajole me to spring in your arms” Sonu said when Tarun pulled her in his arms.

“I love You Sonu, I understand that you are not feeling the excitement of marriage, but we have to be practical. I cannot promise you any future, and I had told you this on our first date.”

“It might be easy for you Tarun, but for me it’s not that casual. I have not been sleeping with boys casually.”

“Oh gauche! Do you think it is easy for me? I have also not been sleeping with girls for the sake of it. And when I imagine that after marriage, you would be sleeping with someone else…Shit...”

Sonu placed her hand on Tarun’s lips and kissed him.

After ten minutes, Sonu got up from the bed picking her clothes avoiding eye contact with Tarun. She was looking embarrassed with a feeling of guilt on her face.

“This was our last meeting, Tarun,” She said and unlocked the door,” I cannot cheat my fiancé anymore. Bye.” Her eyes were wet and so was Tarun’s.

“Hey Sonu, just listen, please don’t misunderstand me. I didn’t call you here to make out. But it just happened. “

“It’s not your fault, Tarun, Bye. Take care” She said and stepped out of the room.

“Sonu, please listen to me, I love you.” Before Tarun could reach the door, Sonu had vanished. He couldn’t control his tears then and remembering the last encounter, he broke down.

“I think; I am habituated of missing her. The yearning is now unbearable”, he murmured, “Na hai wo bewafa aur na main hoon bewafa, wo meri aadaton ki tarah chhutata nahin”